Eleanor took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts. She knew she had to confront Julian, even though she was certain nothing would change.
It was simply a futile act, one she needed to make for the sake of her own sanity and conscience.
“I saw you looking at our mom,” Eleanor began, her voice trembling slightly. “Are you trying to seduce her too?”
Julian chuckled, as a wicked grin tugged at the corner of his lips.
“Well, is that what you’re worried about?” He took a step closer to her. “Yes Eleanor, Everyone. Mother, Eva, Grandmother… and Eliot too.”
Eleanor’s face went pale, her heart racing at the mention of her niece. It was within her expectation about their mother, grandmother, and sister, but her niece too?
“I… I can’t believe you would go that far,” Eleanor whispered. “Even Eliot?”
Julian gave a shrug. “Why not? They are all part of the family and you should know that better than anyone.”
Eleanor was taken aback by Julian’s casual remark as he spoke about the women in their family.
However open-minded she was, she couldn’t completely shake the image of their family falling apart from Julian’s reckless pursuit of everyone around him.
“But will that not destroy our family?” she asked. “How would father, grandpa, and everyone feel about this?
Julian laughter echoed through the room. “Feel?” he repeated, as though the word were foreign to him. “That’s certainly an interesting word you used.”
Eleanor blinked in confusion. “What do you mean?” she asked.
She watched as Julian’s demeanor shifted. His playful smile was now replaced by a more serious expression. It was as if he had transformed, becoming someone else entirely.
“Feel? What do we feel?” Julian said, his voice colder now. “Emotions. They’re certainly mysterious, aren’t they?”
He paused for a moment as he considered his own words. “Yes, they are. Human emotions make us do things that we may not even normally think of.”
“What are you trying to say?” Eleanor asked, her voice trembling slightly despite her efforts to remain composed.
Julian’s eyes glowed with an amusement. “Our whole existence is governed by these unexplainable emotions,” he said.
“Look at us—how we were enjoying ourselves just days ago as we shared those intimate moments. And now, here we are, having this serious conversation. There might be a chance that I won’t make it through tomorrow; perhaps then sorrow and tears will be all that’s left in your heart..”
“And it’s all the product of emotions.” he declared.
Eleanor felt a knot form in her stomach. She knew there was something deeper and darker to his words.
“To me, it’s a form of manipulation.” Julian continued with pensive expression. “I believe we ourselves are being manipulated by none other than our own selves.”
Eleanor felt a shiver run through her. His words were unsettling, and the calmness with which he spoke made them all the more chilling. It was as if he saw emotions, something most people viewed as natural and uncontrollable, as nothing more than a tool to be wielded.
“What are you trying to say, Julian?” she asked again.
Julian looked at her, his expression unreadable. “What I mean, Eleanor,” he said slowly, “is that we are all just puppets, acting on the strings of our own desires, our own emotions. We think we are in control, but in reality, we never are.”
Eleanor’s heart raced, a mix of confusion and fear. Was he saying that everything they did, every decision they made, was just the result of being controlled by something they couldn’t see? That nothing was truly their own choice?
Julian’s gaze bore into Eleanor, “Why would transcendence, awakening, and spirituality all hint at emotional detachment?” he asked.
He laughed and dismissed his question without an answer, leaving Eleanor’s mind racing.
“You know, Eleanor, when I first confessed to Mother—” Julian started, but he was immediately interrupted by Eleanor’s shock.
“Confess? Have you told—” her voice trembled, but Julian simply raised his hand to silence her.
Julian’s voice was eerily calm as he continued, “When I confessed to her, she could have told anyone—father, grandfather, you, Eva, and it would have immediately stopped me. I would have been branded a psychopath, kicked out of the family, shunned by the entire world, and maybe even killed.”
He paused, letting the weight of his words sink in before adding, “But she didn’t. She chose to keep it to herself.”
He leaned in slightly, his voice lowering as he asked, “Do you know why?”
Eleanor could feel her heart pounding in her chest as an unfamiliar fear crept in, unsure of what Julian was truly getting at.
“It’s fear,” he said. “But not just any fear. It’s a fear born from affection. From love.”
Julian’s smile twisted with a mix of amusement and something darker as he continued.
“She fears for my future, for hers, for yours, for father’s… for the whole family.” He paused, his gaze fixed on Eleanor, as if he could see straight into her soul.
“Her words remain unsaid because she is a mother, a wife, and a duchess. She fears the crumbling of everything she has built.”
Eleanor’s breath caught in her throat as she knew deep down that he was right. Regina’s silence, her hesitation, it wasn’t just about family or duty. It was about everything she had worked for, everything she had carefully constructed in her life.
The possibility of it all falling apart… the thought was terrifying.
“And she knows,” Julian continued, “that she can’t do anything. The only thing in her power is to bury it deep in her chest, to hide it, to pretend its not there. Pretend it doesn’t matter. And in the center of it all, she is trapped, caged in her own fear with no way out, making her a prisoner, Eleanor. Not of me, but of herself. Of the life she has built, the image she has held together for so long”
His gaze never wavered as he leaned in slightly. “And that’s where all the manipulation starts.”