Chapter 30: Remember kids, animals can get smashed too
“Booaaa…”
“Kuu!”
Once Ricardo, Jin Fang and Zhen Liu reached the large creature stables, they were greeted by the sight of a rather hungover looking Raijin Hippo mother laying on her side and a much smaller baby hippo poking at her mother. Scattered about their sleeping area was an absurd amount of fruit rinds and crushed vegetable bits.
“Okay…why?,” Zhen Liu asked in an mildly exasperated tone. He recalled when he got to the city stables that they had charged him an arm and a leg for basic amenities and food for the evening with plans to take Tiny and Mini back home the next evening. Now he had to throw that plan out the window because it appeared Tiny went through what Zhen Liu could only describe as a vegan fraternity rager. Honestly, he was surprised there wasn’t a corpse.
“Well…”, Ricardo began to say while scratching the back of his head, “y’all ever eaten Honey Pumpkins?”
“Once,” Jin Fang answered, “it was at a banquet in honor of the Fifth Young Master’s birthday. It was too sweet for my taste.”
“Wait, isn’t Honey Pumpkin the same stuff they use to make Hallowed Mead? That would mean…oh no” Zhen Liu began to say before turning to the stable master, “You fed Tiny fermented Honey Pumpkins?
Honey Pumpkins were type of low grade aether fruit known for it’s ultra sweet flesh and gooey, honey-like juices. When honey pumpkins are fermented and processed properly, it produces a lovely type of alcohol refered to as “Hallowed Mead”. Boasting a proof of sixty and a spicy-sweet flavor profile, hallowed mead makes for a popular drink for young and old drinkers alike…granted fermented honey pumpkin needed to be heavily diluted before it gets to that point.
“Well…yeah,” Ricardo said while scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. “One of the guys we sent out to get feed for the aether beasts last night didn’t go to our usual suppliers because he wanted to save money, and he forgot to check the ripeness of the fruits and vegetables. By the time I was able to check out the quality of the stock, it was too late.”
“Goaa…”
Tiny let out a small groan as if to punctuate the stable masters’ point.
“She managed to eat about thirty or so fermented honey pumpkins before I could stop her…she looked like she was having fun though.”
Jin Fang looked a bit shocked at the amount of fermented pumpkins Tiny had managed to eat, only mildly aware of the amount of dilution. Zhen Liu on the other hand looked absolutely floored for a split moment before feigning indifference. He has already established the image of being a badass in front of her earlier today, no need to shatter that image by acting like a hyperactive rube.
It didn’t stop him from thinking like one though.
‘Thirty pumpkins?! Christ, that’s like chugging at least three barrels worth of one-eighty proof moonshine!,’ Zhen Liu estimated based on a mix of past life random video browsing and current body’s book learning. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure but he knew that if Tiny wasn’t a Raijin Hippo, she’d be dead from alcohol poisoning.
As Zhen Liu stared on, his line for thinking was suddenly interrupted by a bumping feeling on his leg.
“Kuu!”
“Huh?”
Looking downwards, he saw that little Mini had decided to stop bothering her mother and started to bother him for cuddles. Once she had Zhen Liu’s attention, she started to stare at him with big “puppy eyes”. Deciding to oblige, Zhen Liu crouched down and picked Mini up for some cuddling, and to introduce her to Jin Fang.
“Well, I wanted you to meet Tiny and Mini, but Tiny is currently healing. So here’s Mini.”
“Kuu!”
Zhen Liu presented Mini towards Jin Fang, holding her like a cat and gesturing for Jin Fang to hold the rambunctious baby hippo.
Jin Fang was hesitant at first, but her defenses quickly melted as she stared at the baby hippo doing cute little leg wiggles. She quickly scooped up the baby hippo and started cuddling and petting Mini like she was a pet puppy.
“D’awww, who’s a cute little Raijin Hippo? You are, yes you are!”
“Kuu!”
Zhen Liu had a relaxed, content face as he watched Jin Fang and Mini play together. Ricardo on the other hand noticed how Zhen Liu was staring at Jin Fang. A delightful little idea popped into his head a few seconds later after adding two and two together.
“Why don’t you two take the little guy out with you guys? I’ll make sure the mama gets better while you three go out and have fun on the town.”
“You sure?,” Jin Fang asked while still playing with Mini, “Won’t Tiny get worried if Mini’s missing? What if she gets lost while we’re out?”
“Nah,” Ricardo dismissed with a wave of his hand, “I’m pretty sure she’d be thankful for the peace and quiet for a bit. And if you’re worried about her getting lost…”
Ricardo made his way over to a nearby storage chest and pulled out a collar and leash combo. He then went over to Mini and Jin Fang.
“Hold her still for a bit,” he instructed.
“Oh, okay.”
“Kuu?”
A flurry of motion and a moment later, Mini was now wearing a little red collar complete with leash. While it didn’t seem to bother Mini, she did seem curious about her new accessory and attempted to chew on it. She failed to get the collar, but she did manage to succeed getting her mouth on the leash and began to teeth on it.
“There,” Ricardo said while dusting his hands, “now she won’t get lost while you two go out.”
Zhen Liu was mildly disappointed at the mundane collar. He figured the stable master would’ve given him some kind of aether tool that could suspend Mini mid-air or something. ‘Ah well, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.’
“Now off with ya. I hear there’s an exhibition match going on in town. Might be worth watching,” Ricardo instructed while shooing the two youngsters away. Zhen Liu and Jin Fang made sure to thank Ricardo a few times before finally leaving with Mini in tow.
As they left, Ricardo leaned on a nearby post while a sly smile appeared on his face.
“Aissh, didn’t even try to deny that I implied they were couple. To be young and in love.”
“Boaa…”
“Right right,” Ricardo said as he got ready to get back to work, “Do you want pickled cabbage or radish?”
“Boaa…”
“You never had either? Both it is.”
