Chapter 778: Day in the life of Jack
[Maestro, are you sure that’s English? We have established that the power of [Chaos], combined with Logos and Pathos fiddling with your brain, makes it so you can understand most languages and autotranslates.]
‘I am aware, Hurricroak, which is why I turned it off a for a bit while staring at the sign. That’s English, and if I had to make a guess based on the wording, it’s American English no less.’
[What makes you say that?]
‘Because Nepherage, that top name in Hoof Speech letters is a mistranslation. The name of this place is actually Jack’s Diner, and diners are basically an American thing.’
[Ah.]
‘Reminds me of a lifetime ago…regardless, this leads to a bigger question.’
[Which is…]
‘What version of Earth is this guy from?’
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On a certain blue planet, in the middle of nowhere, was…a diner.
To those who don’t know what a diner is, they’re basically inexpensive restaurants that specialize in simple foods like hamburgers, sandwiches, fried chicken, or anything one would eat for breakfast. Basically, anything that could be prepared on short notice and in relatively quick manner. They also typically provide coffee, milkshakes or some kind of pie, but that depends on the place.
At a first glance, this diner was incredibly…typical and generic.
On the outside, it was a one story building with aluminum metal walls, windows all around it and a big neon sign that read, “Jack’s Diner”. Meanwhile, the insides were even more typical.
One side of the diner was a series of empty booths, the seats being made of a dark blue leather while the tables themselves metal lined composite wood with a glass cover. While on the other side, was long counter accompanied by at least a dozen stools that were bolted into the ground. Pass that counter was the main kitchen area, where diners could see and smell their food being prepared, alongside the coffee being brewed in large, cylindrical machines.
There was even an old style jukebox sitting in the corner.
However, it should be noted that this diner had not one, but two secrets to it.
The first, and more mundane, secret was that the owner of the diner, the titular Jack as it were, just so happened to live in the diner.
There was a room in the very back of the establishment, which was essentially a medium sized apartment. Supposedly, it used to be one of two walk-in freezers, but the generator for it broke a long time ago.
As such, Jack used the space as living quarters since it was significantly cheaper than renting or buying a house.
Perhaps it wasn’t an ideal way to live, but it was his and he wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Ahhhh-haaa. That was a good rest…what time is it? Oh…okay, time to get ready for the breakfast rush,” Jack yawned as he made his way out into the main kitchen area from his apartment.
The second secret was a bit more… fantastic.
“Ground beef, check. Bacon, check. Filets from Black Thorn Tilapia, check. Geode eggs from a Rock Feather Fowl, check. Sapphire eggs from Azure Lightning peacock, check…”
Jack didn’t exactly know when or why it happened, but for some inexplicable reason, a very strange door appeared out of nowhere and attached itself to a blank piece of wall where Jack was originally going to place a statue of Elvis Presley. Thankfully, he didn’t.
“The pies should be done baking by now and…wait, did I use the Ruby Crystal Cherries or Garnet Crystal Cherries? Shit…”
Eventually, Jack learned that the door in question was somehow connected to another world, one that was called Valresta.
“Alright, today’s special is gonna be a Cockatrice Omelette stuffed with Dryad’s Delight fungus and…salsa done Efreeti Republic style…for now. I should probably ask Miss Aranea for another batch of ingredients, soon.”
When he initially discovered this door, Jack freaked the hell out of his mind.
How else would one react when they discover a literal doorway to another world appearing in their place of work/living space?
After some time, learning about Valresta’s vast array of deliciously strange ingredients, and getting a few customers from this strange doorway(as well as realizing that they paid in precious metals), Jack eventually settled on the idea of being his world’s (probably) only isekai diner.
After confirming everything was in place, Jack proceeded to position himself behind the diner’s main counter and mentally prepare himself for the arrival of customers from the other side.
The only downside is that he didn’t know who would walk through that door until it happened.
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*Bing-Bong*
Please note that Hoof Speech is vaguely close to English, but there are some words that don’t translate one to one.
As such, these words will have () to show the difference.
As for which words will be in English and which ones will be Hoof Speech…that shall be left to the readers.
Thank you, sorry for the interruption.
*Bing-Bong*
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The Zhen Clan had no idea what to expect when they entered the unassuming building with the name of “Cafe Jack”.
It didn’t look all too impressive on the outside, carrying the aesthetic of a recently built frontier style building, and it didn’t even have any windows that could show them how it looked on the inside.
However, the moment they crossed that door, they were pleasantly surprised.
Well, most of them were.
“Whoa…”
“This is…different.”
“I simultaneously love the look, but hate it at the same time. Feels cheap yet…homey.”
“It smells like bacon and sugar, I immediately love this place.”
‘Holy shit…this…this is an actual diner!,’ Zhen Liu thought in alarm.
From the curved ceiling, the possibly faux leather booths to the singular counter and jukebox in the corner, this place looked exactly like one of the diners that lined highways back home or were located in the middle of literal bumfucking nowhere. There were even several pieces of memorabilia from the American 50s-70s era.
It was…strangely nostalgic.
A feeling that was soon compounded the moment he heard the owner’s voice.
“Hello and welcome to Cafe Jack (Jack’s Diner). Feel free to sit where-oh! Miss Aranea, what a nice surprise! You normally only come every other day, what’s the occasion?”
“Oh, no big occasion, Jack. Just here to get breakfast. This is my employer, Patriarch Zhen Shi, and his family. Hope you don’t mind the big party.”
“Nah, nah! More the merrier!”
‘Okay, that was clearly English with a clear Southern accent…wait a minute, why did he sound native to me for a second?’
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=Oh, well, this is as good as time as any to bring it up, but you know how in your head, Radiant Feather’s language sounds vaguely French?=
‘Yes…’
∆Hoof Speech, by your definition, is a mix of American Southern and a touch of Bostonian…kind of? If you go to the Golden Horns Confederacy, they lean very heavily on the latter.∆
‘That…that makes a little too much sense.’
∆Right???∆
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“Hang on a minute, are you by any chance the patriarch of the Zhen Clan? The guys with all dem aether beasts(magic creatures)?”
“Uh…yes,” Zhen Shi confirmed, a bit stunned by Jack’s straightforward demeanor. He was briefly reminded of his auntie in that exact moment, but quickly shook the thought out of his head.
That said, he got the feeling if they ever met, they would get along a little too well.
“Well, shit! I owe you guys a huge favor (helluva debt) or two!”
“You do? What’d you do?”
It should be noted that that latter question was aimed at Aranea (Arachnidame).
“Honestly, not much,” Aranea replied.
“Not much?,” Jack protested in disbelief. “Aranea helped to clear out some bad eggs(punk ass bitches) from my establishment and then helped to supply me ingredients after those bastards came back for revenge,” he explained. “In return, she gets a free cup of coffee every time she comes in, while the Zhen Clan’s members all get a discount on meals. Hey! Since this the first time the patriarch (big boss) himself is here to eat, consider this meal on the castle (on the house).”
“Huh?”
“He means it’s free.”
“Ah…well then, it’d be rude not to take you up on that offer. Feel free to sit wherever, everyone.”
Given the go ahead, the Zhen Clan members immediately filled up most of the booths and a couple of the counter seats.
During this process, Zhen Liu shot Aranea(Arachnidame) a bit of judging glare the moment it registered that she was getting regular cups of free coffee.
A little known fact about spiders is that they can get drunk off caffeine. In other words, Aranea has been drinking a mug of what was essentially her equivalent to whiskey practically every other day.
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‘Arachnidame…are you good? Do we need to stage an intervention?’
[It’s fine, young master. You should know that despite me being part spider, coffee doesn’t have the same effect on me as it does in lesser arachnids. For me, it’s just a lite tingle.]
‘If you say so…’
