“Besides, Selia is right. Hybrid children are too much to handle for a human without the proper tools and I’m often absent. Don’t make my same mistakes and don’t lose so much. Children only have one first time at everything and I’ve missed most of it.” He sighed.
Lith didn’t like talking about such things. After an awkward pause, he told both Solus and Protector the full story about his meeting with Mogar.
“The fuck?” Solus was flabbergasted. “This is way more important than you being an Abomination. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“I strongly disagree.” Lith replied. “As for your question, I knew how you felt after discovering how much death your legacy had caused and I can’t even imagine the pain you experienced from losing your body a few hours after getting it.
“Adding my burden to your own would have just been cruel. I already felt bad for what I did to Khalia and for making you witness her fate. I couldn’t risk giving you more scars.”
“You should have told me.” Solus sighed, but as the memories of the magical lobotomy flashed in front of her eyes, she was glad he didn’t.
“Do you feel guilty about that merfolk?” Protector’s voice sounded genuinely worried. No matter what Lith told him, the Skoll wouldn’t judge him for it.
“No, but I’m not proud of my actions either and that’s a first. I’m used to collateral damage. I’m aware that after Aren’s plan failed, making Solus follow Khalia was our only shot at uncovering the secrets of Kolga, but it doesn’t make me feel any better.
“Because of me, Khalia will be remembered as a hero, yet I know she died a dog’s death. I honestly don’t know how Carl managed to forgive me so easily nor why did he still care so much about me.” Lith said.
“Because he loves you and because as long as you realize the weight of your actions, you’ll never truly be an Abomination. Having no feelings doesn’t make you strong, it makes you empty.
“You should have learned at this point that protecting is much more difficult than killing, but the perks are also way better.” Ryman smiled while lifting Fenrir in the air with his huge hands.
“Dada.” The baby girl said while giggling.
“What do you mean? Either you are an Abomination or you aren’t. There is no middle ground.” Lith replied.
“Indeed, yet you seem to have failed to grasp the definition of Abomination. Do you remember what I told him before we faced the Wither?” He asked.
“Yes. You call them Abominations not because of what they do, but because of what they are.”
“Exactly.” Protector nodded. “What do you think that means?”
“That Abominations are ruthless predators enslaved to their hunger.” Lith replied.
“Wrong. Humans kill all kinds of living beings for sport or need, yet they didn’t earn such a title. Despite the fact that they consider all other races as prey, not even monsters and undead are called that way.” Protector pointed out.
“Okay, you lost me. What’s the big difference then? As I see it, Abominations and undead are almost the same thing.” Lith sighed.
“Wrong again. There’s a reason why Mogar gave up on a single species and that’s because Abominations subvert the natural order of things. They can’t reproduce, they destroy rather than enrich their environment, and more importantly, their very first act is to prey on their own kin.
“Just like the Wither we faced years ago slaughtered most of the Byk clan, every Abomination sacrifices those who they held dearest first before plaguing the rest of Mogar.
“Even monsters and undead aren’t so destructive. They value their existence and strive to live it to their fullest. Abominations, instead, have no life at all. You can consider them as points fixed in time, incapable of moving either forward or backward.
“You are not an Abomination because you built rather than destroy. Because you protected your pack when you could have easily sacrificed them in exchange for greater power. You are still grief-stricken from your past, but you’re not fixed in time.
“You’ve come a long way since we first met in the woods, when you were still a murderous kid incapable of trusting anyone. You even renounced to part of your life so that I could have one.” Protector handed Fenrir to him, which Lith promptly took in his arms with the gentlest touch he was capable of.
“I may have fathered my children, but in a way, they are also yours. Your life force flows through my veins as well as in my kids’. I believe that there’s a reason why Mogar bestowed upon you a bloodline so strong that it can keep the abyss inside of you at bay.”
Protector weaved together two chore magic spells, making them take the form of a shadow demon and a fire beast coiling around each other in an eternal struggle for dominance.
“If what Mogar has said is true and your human life force is nothing but an echo of the flesh your soul wears, then which one of the two sides your real life force is made of will win?”
“The one I feed.” Lith replied.
“Indeed. You should stop letting others define what you are. Is it my human appearance that makes me a father or the fact that I care about my family with all of my heart? Actions speak louder than any pretentious word.
“If anyone dares to doubt my love for my wife just because I’m an Emperor Beast, it’s their problem, not mine.” Protector stood up, gesturing Lith to follow him.
“If there’s something you should be ashamed of, is not how you came to this world but what you did with that time. Do you realize that I achieved the blue core when you still went to the academy yet you surpassed me in a few years?”
“Even now that I’ve finally refined my core to bright blue, you’re already half-step into violet. Stop running and take your time to appreciate what you have. We both know that there’s no telling when the things we take for granted will be taken away from us.”
***
Lith spent the rest of the morning playing with the children of the Verhen, Fastarrow, and Yehval households while mulling over Protector’s words. He had missed both his little brother Aran and his niece Leria who were now over five years old.
‘It seems like the day before yesterday when I held them between my arms and yesterday when they had trouble using the bathroom. I really missed a lot.’ Lith sighed.
Aran had developed a pitch-black streak amid his light brown hair while Leria had her blonde hair streaked silver and red all over. They were both smart enough to have already learned to read, write, and count.
‘The males in our family never got any elemental streak. Did my birth someway affect my entire bloodline? Could it be that to give me my beast side Mogar had to change my relatives as well?’ Lith thought.
‘Keep it up like that and I’ll make you a tinfoil hat.’ Solus laughed. After talking with Protector, her mood had slightly improved. She also considered the Skoll as her true friend and confidant.