Kamila kept staring at him without saying a word until she slowly managed to stand up again despite her shaky knees.
“I’m sorry.” Her face was like her voice, cold and emotionless.
She sounded and moved like a broken automaton as she wobbled toward the door, slamming it behind her without ever looking back. The vibrations traveled from the door frame through the pavement, hitting Lith with the strength of a quake.
He was already kneeling so his legs couldn’t buckle up and fall.
What remained of his human side, however, shattered like glass. Lith was aware that his happiness had been built upon lies. Now that the truth had been exposed, only the Abomination and the Void that his life was remained.
After several minutes, when it was clear that Lith had no intention of standing up and Kamila of returning, Solus activated their mind link again. It took her a second to discover how much he had shared with Kamila and understand the gravity of the situation.
‘I’m sorry.’ Even though she had used the exact same words as Kamila, their meaning couldn’t have been more different.
Her thoughts and face were filled with compassion, knowing that with each layer of deception that Lith had lifted he had also been forced to cut open old wounds that had never truly healed.
Even with all of Solus’ efforts over the years, the best she had achieved was to not make them fester.
She was now crying no less than Kamila, but her tears were caused by the pain and sadness they had shared since the day they had met.
Solus kneeled in front of Lith, hugging him tight to let him know that no matter what came next, he would never be truly alone. The Void and the Chaos inhabiting him stirred, stinging at her just like they had done to the Voidwalker armor.
Yet instead of harming Solus, they triggered the golden radiance of her body, making her glow despite being flesh and blood. Light and darkness fought for a few seconds until they seeped into each other.
The emptiness of the Void became filled with stars while Solus’ radiance became shrouded by darkness, making her look like a dawning sun.
‘Why did you lash out like that back at Valeron?’ She asked the Void instead of Lith, glad to have the opportunity to finally face him after all those years.
‘I did it for you.’ He replied, flabbergasting her.
‘What do you mean? The Royals and the Council are no friends of ours but they are trustworthy allies. You could have just refused the mission.’
‘They are our allies only because they aren’t aware of your existence. Otherwise they wouldn’t hesitate one second to kill me in order to get their hands on the tower.’ His thoughts became cold, sounding like a low snarl.
‘As for the mission, what excuse could I’ve possibly come up with that wouldn’t have led the Royals to use our deal as a leash and force me to do it? Nothing I said would have mattered to them. This way, instead, I exploited their fear of a wild Abomination.
‘They expected me to lose control and that’s exactly what I gave them.’
‘Are you telling me that you’ve planned for this ever since the Royals came to visit us in the Desert?’ Solus felt touched by his care for her as much as Lith was shocked by the Void’s deviousness.
‘Just another contingency plan.’ He replied.
‘A contingency plan for what, exactly? You’ve still jeopardized your deal with the Royals and I doubt they’ll let this slide. They’ll just ask you to learn to control your Abomination side.’
‘To buy some time and make sure that nothing happens to you.’ Lith gently caressed her face as he leaned his forehead against hers.
‘Back when Carl died, he took the world with him. Nothing had sense anymore. I was waiting for death way before I learned about my cancer. Taking my life was the easiest thing I’ve ever done because I knew there would be no consequences.
‘There was no one left who truly knew me and who would mourn my loss. My brief existence as an alien taught me how frail life is and how sudden death can come, but back then I didn’t care.
‘The world was still a dull, grey, insignificant mass. Even once I came here to Mogar, life wasn’t something precious. It was just something that I gave and took. Barely a currency.
‘I liked my new family, but I still put myself first and I was ready to take my life again the moment I discovered that magic wouldn’t give me any edge over my competition.
‘Yet everything changed when I met you, Solus. At first, I hated having someone inside my head, reading my thoughts and constantly nagging at me. After a while, though, I noticed that the world wasn’t grey anymore.
‘There was light, warmth, and beauty even in the most trivial things around me. Before I realized it, I had someone who I liked again. Someone who knew who I really was and who worried about me instead of the mask I wore for the rest of Mogar.
‘You had become my sun, painting with bright colors even the dullest of things. The more time we spent together, the more I cared for you until I couldn’t imagine my life without you.
‘Even in my mind, “I” became “we”.’
‘What does this have to do with the Royals?’ Solus sniffled, hugging him tighter.
‘The moment the Unwavering Loyalty array didn’t work on me, I knew that the Royals would’ve sent me to the Golden Griffon as soon as they were done debriefing me about the rest of the plan.
‘Had I remained silent, you would’ve been forced to come with me and risk remaining trapped there. This way, instead, I can leave you behind if that’s what you want.’ The Void replied.
‘Did you really put everything you worked so hard for at risk because of me?’ She now mirrored him, cupping his face while caressing it with her thumbs.
‘Yes. When Nalear managed to split us apart, the pain I felt allowed me to manifest my presence even without the blue core. Back when I thought that the Odi had killed you, I further damaged my life force to avenge you.
‘There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for you. I know that I’m your leash just like the deal with the Royals is mine, but I refuse to be the chain that will drag you down this pit with me.
‘If I have to die, I want to give you the opportunity to be happy. I don’t care who you pick as your next host. Tista, Silverwing, even Grandma will give you everything I never cou-‘
‘Silly man, I can’t imagine my life without you either.’ She pushed his head up to look her in the eyes. ‘Otherwise I would have stayed in Kolga, accepted aunt Loka’s offer, or simply asked Salaark to break our imprint.
‘I knew that as long as we are bonded, we can’t be together the way I’d like to. Yet I also knew that without that bond, I wouldn’t be capable of being there for you in this crazy rollercoaster that’s your life.’